Sunday, February 12, 2012


We have people fooled. I in no way try to represent myself as someone I am not. I like to be honest. I am a nerdy librarian who was a crazy daughter. I am a pretty selfish person and very controlling. To add to those wonderful qualities, I have no patience. And that is why I seem to have people fooled.

This week I held story time in the library for the three classrooms of daycare at the College. Several of the teachers thanked me and praised my patience. I immediately responded to them that I am not a patient person. I even had my daughter vouch for me, but they seemed unconvinced.

I took my daughter to the dentist this past week. The hygienist and dentist both praised her for being such a sweet angel. I guess she didn't bit or cry so in the world of kids dentistry she was pretty good, but she is not a sweet angel.

A few years ago I would never had admitted publicly that I am impatient, selfish and a bit controlling person, but the older I get (I realize I am only 28 that that is a big developmental difference from age 24 when D was born) the more I realize I do have faults and it is okay to have them. I am embracing my faults and trying to work with them.

Do we have many more good traits than bad, yes. Am I a good mother, yes. Am I a perfect mother, no. Is my child happy, yes. Do we fight, constantly. Does she want to be just like me, yes and that may be the biggest reason that I recognize these faults. I see them being passed on. We are good at fooling people.

1 comment:

  1. I also think I am selfish and self-centered. But I think in this realization and belief in ourselves, we're really conciencious about our habits and maybe trying to do something about them. Like when Charlie woke up today at 7:30 and I wasn't ready to get up yet, instead of kneeing Chris in the back, I thought to myself, "Talia, don't be such a selfish bitch", and I got my butt up. Like you said, you're a good mom, and that you're aware of some of your self-believed shortcomings is a good thing.